Philippians 4:6-7
6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (NIV)
6Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. 7Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life. (MSG)
It's amazing how a conversation with Jim can completely change one's outlook. All that I've been feeling recently about England and friendships is not what I thought it was about. This isn't about trusting God to bring in the money; it's about trusting God to do the best thing for my heart. And it might be that the best thing for my heart is what I am learning before I go to England. So the outcome isn't going to England or not going to England, what God wants for me is to grow. It might be that I don't go to England (which would solve the problem of missing my friends, but Jim told me that I have a community waiting for me in England that God has planned for me if I go..trust, Sara!!). But I think I would be okay with it. It's God's plan, and my Abba only wants the best for His Princess. My heart's growth is more important that what I end up doing. The real battle is for my heart to trust. The money situation is just the scene of the battle. And this isn't the battle that decides whether I can trust God perfectly for the rest of my life or not, this is just another round in the battle for trust. The first round, or one of the first rounds, was four years ago when I was a senior in high school, worrying over what my life would be like after I graduated. I couldn't make it through one day without repeating Phil 4:6-7 to myself, just to calm myself down. Then, the battle was simply to plant the idea in my head that God could come through for me. Now, it's to plant it in my heart more deeply. Each battle, though it be for the same thing, roots it deeper and deeper into my heart. This time I need to present my requests to my Abba, and let it be. And although I've pestered Him too much about it lately, I think I need to go through the list again, kind of mark off each item I'm worried about and individually give each worry to Him. I've been avoiding Him like the plague, and that's probably why this house I'm in has seemed so lonely. He's been waiting there for me, and I've tried to fill up my mind with other things. But we had a chat yesterday at the flimsy excuse for a dinner table during dinner last night. It was nice. Although it felt a little weird drinking iced tea with an empty chair. One might think I've gone mental. It's probably just the opposite..I've finally become sane. And I do feel a sense of peace...not completely (I have yet to go through the list of worries), but there's a sense that it's all no longer chaos. I've got my feet planted on the truth of what this really is, and my sword is at the ready. This battle is going to be fought, not simply endured. I am Sara Beth, Princess of the house of God, shieldmaiden and warrior of Zion. I fight for truth. I fight for trust.
6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (NIV)
6Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. 7Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life. (MSG)
It's amazing how a conversation with Jim can completely change one's outlook. All that I've been feeling recently about England and friendships is not what I thought it was about. This isn't about trusting God to bring in the money; it's about trusting God to do the best thing for my heart. And it might be that the best thing for my heart is what I am learning before I go to England. So the outcome isn't going to England or not going to England, what God wants for me is to grow. It might be that I don't go to England (which would solve the problem of missing my friends, but Jim told me that I have a community waiting for me in England that God has planned for me if I go..trust, Sara!!). But I think I would be okay with it. It's God's plan, and my Abba only wants the best for His Princess. My heart's growth is more important that what I end up doing. The real battle is for my heart to trust. The money situation is just the scene of the battle. And this isn't the battle that decides whether I can trust God perfectly for the rest of my life or not, this is just another round in the battle for trust. The first round, or one of the first rounds, was four years ago when I was a senior in high school, worrying over what my life would be like after I graduated. I couldn't make it through one day without repeating Phil 4:6-7 to myself, just to calm myself down. Then, the battle was simply to plant the idea in my head that God could come through for me. Now, it's to plant it in my heart more deeply. Each battle, though it be for the same thing, roots it deeper and deeper into my heart. This time I need to present my requests to my Abba, and let it be. And although I've pestered Him too much about it lately, I think I need to go through the list again, kind of mark off each item I'm worried about and individually give each worry to Him. I've been avoiding Him like the plague, and that's probably why this house I'm in has seemed so lonely. He's been waiting there for me, and I've tried to fill up my mind with other things. But we had a chat yesterday at the flimsy excuse for a dinner table during dinner last night. It was nice. Although it felt a little weird drinking iced tea with an empty chair. One might think I've gone mental. It's probably just the opposite..I've finally become sane. And I do feel a sense of peace...not completely (I have yet to go through the list of worries), but there's a sense that it's all no longer chaos. I've got my feet planted on the truth of what this really is, and my sword is at the ready. This battle is going to be fought, not simply endured. I am Sara Beth, Princess of the house of God, shieldmaiden and warrior of Zion. I fight for truth. I fight for trust.
posted by Anonymous | 4:24 pm
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